The Jonas Brothers have split up! Teenage girls across America will be crying into their milkshakes as we speak. Everyone else will simply be shrugging their shoulders in a demonstration of mild indifference.
These guys were never exactly on my radar. I don’t know their names; I’ve always referred to them simply as the ugly one, the even uglier one, and the one who lives under a bridge on account of his innate ugliness.
Still, the Jonas Brothers are now no more, as this over-dramatic showbiz vlogger explains. The brothers still exist, of course, but they won’t be recording music together any more, at least until they’re offered an insane amount of money to temporarily reform.
Until then our ears can rest easy.
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