There’s an old joke that men only read Playboy for the articles. Picture readers aren’t quite so coy. They’ll proudly admit they buy it to look at the busty women inside and … well … you know.

Everybody does it, but it’s so difficult to say! That’s why we have the colorful euphemisms featured in this brilliant Picture ad. How many can you spot?

For those of you playing at home, the men here are boxing the one-eyed monster, playing the flute, tuning the antenna, beating their meat, polishing the silver, and waxing the dolphin.

I also spotted some guys turning Japanese, squeezing the burrito, batting the sausage, spanking the monkey, and flogging the log!