I’m a huge movie fan, watching as many films as I can consume every week. There are some great films out there, but there are also some truly terrible films out there. Which group does Private Valentine: Blonde and Dangerous belong in?

Definitely, 100 percent, no questions asked, it belongs in the latter group. It’s a truly terrible film which is so bad it went straight to DVD everywhere apart from Bulgaria. Clearly the film capital of the world.

Private Valentine: Blonde and Dangerous features Jessica Simpson as Private Megan Valentine, an American film star who joins the U.S. Army on a whim. Sounds great doesn’t it? And not a bit like Private Benjamin.

However, whereas Private Benjamin stars Goldie Hawn, is funny yet endearing, and a classic, Private Valentine has Ms. Simpson in the lead role, is neither funny or endearing, and is a classic only in the sense of demonstrating how not to make a movie.